• DamienGramatacus@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    Asking someone you love “How was your day?” is a meaningful question. Small talk is bullshit time wasting between randos or acquaintances.

    • milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee
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      6 days ago

      “Lovely weather today, isn’t it?”

      “Yeah, makes me feel like picnics,”

      is expressing feelings to each other, affirming a shared worldview in which sunny weather is good, and affirming the value of each others’ feelings and potential plans.

      Just because the real meaning is hidden, doesn’t negate the value.

  • FourWaveforms@lemm.ee
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    6 days ago

    after you get through all the asking each other stuff to get to know each other’s histories etc phase, it’s okay to just not talk all the time

    • milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee
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      6 days ago

      It’s not just histories and facts, though. Sure, you don’t have to talk all the time, but sharing feelings and connection, in a relaxing way, through small talk, helps maintain and build that connection. More important for some people than others.

  • RedAggroBest@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    Is or is not talking about how your days went considered small talk? I literally don’t know now. I’d say it’s small talk.

    Small talk is a way to gauge someone’s mood before going for the bigger discussions

    • lennivelkant@discuss.tchncs.de
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      6 days ago

      If a colleague asks me “Hi, how’re you doing?” it’s small talk and I’ll respond something like “Oh you know, the usual.” If my partner asks me “Hi, how was your day?” it’s a genuine question and I will respond “That fucking dickhead at work that always plays nice and personable came around with another set of “urgent” requests and no fucking clue what he’s actually asking for, whether it’s possible or why I told him last week it isn’t.”

      The difference is in how serious I take the question.

  • Hadriscus@lemm.ee
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    7 days ago

    I do exactly this ! Hi honey how was your day ? Kids were restless ? Ok. Does that affect your stance on education through play ? is punishment sometimes advisable ? you haven’t read your copy of Foucault’s Discipl… hey where are you going ?.. baby ??

  • hedge_lord@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    I REFRAIN FROM THE PRACTICE OF UTILIZING MINISCULE SPEECH. EACH AND EVERY INSTANCE OF MY EXPRESSION IS VAST AND VERBOSE AND MAXIMAL.

    • BalderSion@real.lemmy.fan
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      6 days ago

      One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about humans was their habit of continually stating the obvious… At first Ford formed a theory to account for this human behaviour. If human beings don’t keep exercising their lips, he thought, their mouths seize up. After a few months’ consideration and observation he abandoned this theory in favour of a new one. If they don’t keep on excercising their lips, he thought, their brains start working.

      One of my favorite passages from the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

  • m3t00🌎@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    got a neighbor can’t control his motor mouth. last time he came to my door i said ‘what the fuck do you want’ and closed/locked the door. not too bright. he yelled through the door, ‘I only want to talk’. hahaha fuck off

    • tiramichu@lemm.ee
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      6 days ago

      Tough one. I’d probably end up being the person who just kept politely listening while trying to shut down the conversation amicably like “well anyway” and “I must get cooking dinner now” and “my plants need moisturising” or something.

      Neighbours are extremely high on the list of people I want to avoid pissing off, because a neighbour with a grudge against you could be an absolute nightmare (especially when you live in a townhouse and share walls)

      • m3t00🌎@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        let him in once. talked non-stop for nearly 2 hours. unstable. out. used to be normalish. lost his mind.

  • Mr. Satan@lemm.ee
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    7 days ago

    The real answer is it doesn’t matter. I feel like I have free will hence I have free will for all meaningful intents and purposes.

    Neither argument can be proven and even if it’s an illusion, it’s strong enough to make the truth irrelevant.

    • orize@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      7 days ago

      At the same time, you claiming/thinking you have free will doesn’t make “the universe” enable it for you. You do not have meta powers.

      • Mr. Satan@lemm.ee
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        6 days ago

        It doesn’t matter. If there is no free will, the illusion is strong enough to make me think that there is.

        There is no way of proving if it’s chemistry, physics, will of god or actual free will. I feel like I have free will, it doesn’t matter what the truth is because the truth cannot break the illusion.

        A brain can only make me feel free will and that’s all that matters practically.

  • ynthrepic@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    Daily life is what daily life is all about.

    I do think I’d potentially be happier with a partner who I could speak philosophy and politics with, but if we couldn’t also function simply navigating running a household and raising our family, then we really couldn’t be anything more than friends with benefits long term. Not that that would be a bad thing. It just depends on how you want to live your life, and whether you value a stable partnership over firey romance.

    Some people are lucky enough to have a partner that fulfills the entirety of their intellectual, intimate, familial and financial needs, but such people are few and far between I’m sure!