A slight majority of these guys are quite muscular.
Henry Cavill is jacked enough to count as at least three
No, no, he’s just a little elf prince. Never worked out a day in his life, no sir. Probably a vegetarian.
To be fair if I was going to depict an elf prince with a hobby of bench pressing trees, he’d probably look a lot like Cavill’s Geralt
I like to think he has a bear as a workout partner, and every nearby dwarven society has a secret training program to try to identify someone that can beat him in an arm wrestle
by my count only Jack Black isn’t of some sort of athletic body type
Is Pedro Pascal generally pretty jacked? I remember him looking buff for Game of Thrones and he’s probably getting into Marvel fit for the F4 movie, but it seems like he leans more towards trim or dad bod, depending on the role. I’m thinking of Last of Us or maybe the second Kingsman movie.
Yes, he’s built.
I believe Pedro’s fans call themselves “Pedrophiles”
Markiplier is athletic?
Edit: I looked at some pictures and the guy must have started working out because he clearly wasn’t in that kind of shape when I was watching him ten years ago!
Did you find the… Charity pictures?
Its so funny because this meme is just the flipped version of guys not knowing what “no makeup” actually looks like.
“Just want a nice normal looking guy like Henry fucking Cavill” lmao. I have no skin in the game being happily married, but hitting the gym/doing sports is still good for you regardless.
Muscular never really hurts, it’s just not the most important feature.
Let’s just write it out: Cover your body up with a look that is on the fashionable end of normal, but have a fit body underneath to reveal.
The “line cook” is fucking jacked tho
And that’s when he’s small. Look at him in The Iron Claw.
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He is also a model.
That does nothing for me; gimme Dad Bod though ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
The classic “I just want a normal body” and the normal body they’re talking about is one on TV that takes a full time job to maintain.
Another less serious thing: backing up the “girls don’t need muscle hunks” with pictures of a bunch of famous actors, several of which are definitely jacked, is not proving the point you want it to.
Depressed middle-aged appeal is apparently a thing. Never in my life was I hit on more (by women and men) as I did when I hit my forties and my hair turned gray.
Come to think of it, that diagram is super accurate. When I was in my teens (elvish) and twenties (line cook) it felt like was living in a sex avalanche, but when I hit my thirties, I became invisible. Thirties doesn’t meet any of the three criteria.
Can confirm. Skinny numetal kid in my teens, too many kitchen and bar jobs in my 20’s and now mid 40’s on Zoloft and apparently old goth dads are on the menu.
Cheers man. May the well never run dry.
Thirties doesn’t meet any of the three criteria.
Math checks out. Had all my relationships in my 20s. Haven’t had a single one in my 30s and I’m going on 38 now.
Your forties are around the corner.
Oh fuck off
He was fuck on in his twenties, and then fuck off in his thirties. We already established that.
You doin’ okay?
When someone says “I was living in a sex avalanche” on the internet it’s hard for me to take them seriously, that’s all
The internet is pretty mainstream now. Being a virgin is no longer a prerequisite.
Yeah but does that necessitate telling them to fuck off?
It’s really not that serious
Let’s see if I can guess everyone here, from left to right, top to bottom:
- the guy from the TV show The Bear
- Eddie from Stranger Things season 4
- Legolas from I’m gonna guess that still is from Return of the King
- Jack Black from School of Rock
- Markiplier?
- Geralt from The Witcher TV Show
- Pedro Pascal’s character from The Last of Us, I think his name was Joel?
Nicely done.
nah it’s just beauty standards from the media give cis straight guys dysphoria
I was just talking about this recently. There are of course some women who like muscle men or assholes, but most women are attracted to men who make them feel safe and/or make them laugh. If it is about looks, they’re probably just looking for a slender/chubby guy who has a caring/funny/brooding kind of look about them.
Also! Looks can change as you get to know someone. A person who was initially hot as hell can become revolting if their personality sucks, and vice versa, someone that didn’t really stand out to you could become literally the hottest person in the universe if their personality rocks!
All the women want a guy who’s rich and famous. Got it.
And buff. Most of those guys are buff and well above average attractiveness.
That line cook is a muscle hunk if you haven’t noticed. He’s a straight-up bodybuilder.
I see this sentiment all the time and it always bothered me, but I only recently realized exactly why: you’re not talking about the same thing as the cis straight guys.
You don’t have to be that attractive to find love. Plenty of ugly people have relationships. Just be yourself, dress well, don’t say stupid things etc then go out and meet people and you’ll probably meet someone you vibe with. But that’s not really what the cis straight guys are talking about. They want to put less effort into having a sex life. They want to walk into a party and have women approach them. They want to feel conventionally attractive. Best way to do that is to be somewhat muscular.
Best way to do that is to be somewhat muscular.
And even then, guys, really get your fucking expectations and entitlements and just like, take them and shove them all into a duffle bag, squeeze any fragile ego you might have laying around in there too, and just throw that thing down a well and forget about it.
Seriously, if you can just “let go” of all the things you wish you had involving dating and relationships, and just learn to enjoy life and enjoy being around people, you will be a thousand, million times happier than the dudes who spend all their time trying and even succeeding to get laid when they want it.
If what you’re doing is frustrating you and making you unhappy… change. That’s your greatest power, just change. Go somewhere else, change what you want, change who you are and be genuine about it. (When you stop caring, it also has the bonus effect of making you cool, and thus wildly attractive to people who get to know you.)
As a former line cook who got married during his elf prince years, I have now gained enough flab to be moved to the depressed middle age father circle.
Explains a lot about my dating life tho
It’s less a out being buff and not ea out signaling that you have enough of your shit together to do something healthy for yourself. Most of y’all fail that bar and wonder why you’re alone.
Whoa whoa! Hey there’s only so many girls with Daddy problems to go around man.
And look- people can pull off the skinny elf look but they can’t pull off Orlando Bloom.
Also who’s in the middle top?
Middle top is Eddie from Stranger Things season 4
And look- people can pull off the skinny elf look but they can’t pull off Orlando Bloom.
Hell, I’ve tried to do both. All it got me were some pants I can’t return and a restraining order. C’est la vie, I guess.
My wife is very practical. See she wanted a faithful husband and really took chris rocks advice to heart.
No sex in the Champagne room?
the particular chris rock advice are you asking? If so its, a man is as faithful as his opportunities. When she saw me walk into that scifi convention with my fully socked crocks and live long and prosper t-shirt. She knew she had found the one.
If you smoke crack, your partners gotta smoke crack?
Can you just cut out the random comment in the meme?
