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resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 3 days ago

Cyclist falls down 130-foot ravine in France, survives 3 days by drinking wine he had in shopping bag

www.cbsnews.com

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Cyclist falls down 130-foot ravine in France, survives 3 days by drinking wine he had in shopping bag

www.cbsnews.com

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 3 days ago
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A helicopter airlifted him to hospital, with a rescue doctor calling his survival "a miracle."

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/38134526

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  • verdi@feddit.org
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    2 days ago

    *WHO

    “There’s no safe amount of alcohol consumption”

    *French geezer

    “Hold my baguette”

  • toynbee@lemmy.world
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    This is probably also what I would say if I were ever found passed out in a ditch.

  • Warl0k3@lemmy.world
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    “His attempt to rescue himself using a ladder constructed from Baguettes sadly failed. Thankfully, rescuers were able to locate him after a passerby noticed a thin trail of cigarette smoke rising from the ravine.”

    Truly glad he got rescued, fuckin’ hell I hope it was at least a decent bottle and that there’s no lasting injuries.

    • Tomtits@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      Unfortunately he lost the string of onions around his neck in the fall

      • resipsaloquitur@lemmy.worldOP
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    • ThePyroPython@lemmy.world
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      This is peak French.

  • gmtom@lemmy.world
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    He fell down a 40m ravine and bottle didn’t smash?

    • _stranger_@lemmy.world
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      All we know is he made it to the bottom with three days worth of wine. Statistically , he likely started that fall with more than three days of wine.

    • weew@lemmy.ca
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      Priorities

  • quick_snail@feddit.nl
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    This is an ad from Big French Wine

  • shalafi@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    77-yo, rolled 130’ downhill, survived with what he had on him. I feel like most y’all would simply die.

    • DampSquid@feddit.uk
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      I would, but that’s my choice

    • BeeegScaaawyCripple@lemmy.world
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      I mean, yeah, but he’s probably healthier than me. Even after the tumble.

  • melsaskca@lemmy.ca
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    He didn’t just survive, he thrived.

  • fubarx@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    Could have lasted a week if he had a baguette and some cheese. Lesson learned.

    • SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca
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      HwarHwarHwar

  • gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.de
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    this is just such a french headline it’s incredible :D

    • SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca
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      The baguette cushioned his fall, and he only had passionate sex 6 times.

  • Blackmist@feddit.uk
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    Christ, what a walking (cycling) stereotype.

    I guess if he got hungry he could have started on the string of garlic he was wearing around his neck.

    • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      Only if he’d already finished the baguette!

  • Mihies@programming.dev
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    3 days ago

    I knew isotonic is not the best bicyclist’s drink to carry around.

    • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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      Of course, this is a standard accessory on any French bicycle.

      • BeeegScaaawyCripple@lemmy.world
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        That website does not work well on mobile, just warning folk

      • Hylactor@sopuli.xyz
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        Yes, I too like to store my thick glass cylinders next to my femoral artery.

      • Fedizen@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Why wouldn’t you carry it in a shopping bag?

        • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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          But then how do you carry the shopping bag?

          • Fedizen@lemmy.world
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            Guy from the news article did it

            • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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              1 day ago

              His bike wine carrier was probably already full so he had no choice.

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