I was hoping for fat baby jd vance

My brain thought it was a light bulb wrapped in masking tape

And it’s too early for that dress.

It’s what I use in a pinch, and actually it’s great for removing mineral sunscreen, but I find it’s harder to wash off than other oil cleansers.

I mean, I’m not enduring anything. I think of it as general upkeep, not too dissimilar to flossing or working out. It keeps my skin healthy and young and unless I’m really busy or in a rush, I don’t mind doing it.

Specifically: I’m 43 years old and nobody ever believes me about that. Most people put me in me early thirties (last year someone guessed late twenties and I thought she was just trying to flatter me but she was dead serious!). My skin doesn’t show my age. I have some fine lines but no deep wrinkles, my skintone is even and the few sunspots I had have faded, and my skin has a healthy glow.

I’ve always looked youthful but now my skin looks younger and healthier than it did 5 years ago.

Yup! Eye makeup (especially liner & mascara) is made to stay where you put it, so it takes time to remove! And similar with mineral sunscreen.

It’s not necessarily complicated, just tedious. Lots of steps. If I wear mineral sunscreen plus makeup, then my evening routine is:

• Remove eye makeup (cold cream): 2 minutes
• Remove face/neck makeup and sunscreen (oil-based cleanser): 5 minutes
• Wash face, neck, and chest (gentle cleanser): 1 minute
• Skincare for face, neck, and chest (3 toners, 1 serum, 1 moisturizer, lip mask; allowing minimum 60 second drydown in between steps): 8 minutes
• (Every other night) Anti-aging (sandwiching tretinoin with rich moisturizer): 6 minutes

So roughly 15-20 minutes every night just for skin.

Plus about 10 minutes in the morning for my most basic AM skincare (not including sunscreen or makeup).

But my skin looks great!

Yeah, any product claiming that is a product I don’t buy.

Cold cream is the only thing I’ve found that really will remove all of my makeup, and it still requires patiently rubbing it into my eye makeup and wiping carefully (especially the eyelashes!) several times to be sure it’s fully gone. And then comes cleanser and the rest of my skincare.

Wealth being shoved upward so the rich get richer at the expense of the rest of us

A lot of them are plastic now which means they’re pretty much room temp

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

I’m too lazy to find it but insert Nelson ha-ha gif here

I had my phone in greyscale mode (and admittedly I’m a little high) and I thought “oh I bet that bathroom’s gorgeous in color” because I took your comment for serious and didn’t see the thumbnail very clearly ANYWAY lemme tell ya the disappointment when I took my phone off greyscale mode…

you got me good

Are they… illegal aliens?

Ugh it’s perfect, I need more absurdist comics like this!

Yeah but they didn’t factor in the extra mass from all those gas station pepperoni sticks so

I hear ya. I don’t mean clean as in sterile, just seems like you can never get all the grease off of them. They always seem like they’re covered in a film of old cooking oil.

I don’t know how people can stand cast iron pans. I know they’re supposed to be great for cooking but I always feel like you can never really get them all the way clean.

Yeah and she was a fucking hypocrite because when she got sick she absolutely accepted medical care. Plus there’s this.

Or took AZO.