I think part of it is that a lot of straight people who are allies but not as familiar with the queer community feel strange about using the word queer, thinking that it’s a reclaimed slur that they wouldn’t be allowed to say if they aren’t themselves queer. They don’t realize that the queer community has collectively decided that no “pass” is needed for the word queer.
Even if it were the case that they didn’t want to be there, “just following orders” is not an acceptable excuse for committing a genocide. The morally correct thing to do if you’re compelled to service in the IDF is to refuse and face the consequences, because they cannot be worse than the moral injury of being tasked with the murder of innocent children.