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Cake day: July 4th, 2023

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  • Was working in a deli department of a grocery store. I think it was my second or third week there, and i was slicing balogna for a customer. Went to peel some of the casing off and got the tip of my thumb instead. Still think the lady who unkindly yanked my stitches out at the urgent care caused the lil flap to come off. It was 2009 and I’m actually impressed i got some tactile feeling back through the scar. I swear it fucks with the touch screen though.









  • In north Carolina, there once was a commissioner of labor named cherie berry. She is the only commissioner of labor who has ever had a picture included on some things, such as the inspection placard inside elevators. She became known as the elevator lady. When i left the state I was beside myself at the lack of people pictures in elevators.

    They made a shirt with that pic. The caption? Cherie berry lifts me up.