Kevin Smith posted on Facebook that this had to be the Catholic Church trolling him for getting back the rights to Dogma and its 29th Anniversary.

…or Hagerstown.

Huh. No one has said ground meat breaker/chopper.shen my wife got one, I said it was a waste, a spatula was fine, etc etc. Then I used it once…holy crap so much better and easier to get exactly the chunkiness you want from ground beef, turkey, etc. Love the the thing now.

This is wrong. Catholics can pray “directly to God”. It’s actually what contrition is considered doing and part of confession. Catholics also believe you can petition Saints for intercession from God (so like, “Hey, you know God, can you put in a good word for me?”).

That second part is what many Protestant denominations have/had an issue with.

The core part here, however, relates to plenary indulgences and is part of what drove Martin’s reformation.

(This is described - the indulgences part being what drove the wedge between Martin Luthor and the Pope - in the Wiki you linked.)

You have to do the bidet dance with a fixed one, works just as well.