I’ve had this issue before. My limited understanding is that your home server fetches copies of communities somebody on your server is subbed to. But if you’re the first person, it can take it a few hours to federate (took mine a day.)

I think Debian unstable works great on laptops, and it’s hard to beat for stability.

This might be a stupid question, but I’m only so-so at wireguard. Do you experience that kind of loss using WG at home, on wifi, between your phone and server?