Hey Folks!

I’ve been living abroad for over half my life in a country where tipping is not the norm. At most you would round up. 19€ bill? Here’s a 20, keep this change.

Going to the US soon to visit family and the whole idea of tipping makes me nervous. It seems there’s a lot of discussion about getting rid of tipping, but I don’t know how much has changed in this regard.

The system seems ridiculously unfair, and that extra expense in a country where everything is already so expensive really makes a difference.

So will AITA if I don’t tip? Is it really my personal responsibility to make sure my server is paid enough?

  • hotspur@lemm.eeEnglish
    2·
    1 year ago

    Culturally, there will be people who will look down on or say nasty things to you if they find out you do not/did not tip. This happened to me.

    Emphasis mine. You said you don’t tip, and you are stating that they wouldn’t be in the wrong for not tipping. Just because you don’t outright say they shouldn’t tip, doesn’t mean it isn’t heavily implied by your wording.

    We can agree that tipping should be eliminated, but if you knowingly go to a restaurant where your waiter requires tips to make a living wage, and you don’t, you are most certainly AH. The solution is to not go to these restaurants.

    • SapphicFemme@lib.lgbtEnglish
      15·
      1 year ago

      So, you are engaging in ad hominem towards me. This is not an appropriate way to handle a situation like this. You said you agreed that things should change, let’s focus on ways that we can change things for the better from a systemic manner, instead of supporting capitalist ruling classes who don’t care for us average poor people and engaging in ad hominem personal attacks please.

      you are most certainly AH

      This is not ok, i am talking from a systemic place and encouraging change to the entire system, employees should work purely for passion and not out of need in my eyes, employees who work in our current system should be paid well by their employees. Tipping should not be a requirement for customers, please stop with name calling.

          • NathanUp@lemmy.mlEnglish
            2·
            1 year ago

            if you knowingly go to a restaurant where your waiter requires tips to make a living wage, and you don’t, you are most certainly AH

            …was the full quote. Even if we accept that this is ad hominem, you would have to engage in the described behavior for it to be so, which certainly doesn’t hurt their argument that you implied people shouldn’t tip.

            • SapphicFemme@lib.lgbtEnglish
              12·
              1 year ago

              Again, as stated in other comments. People shouldn’t be required to tip. employers should pay employees correctly. Tipping culture shouldn’t be a thing and we should work to actually eliminate and not tolerate personal attacks on those who hold different viewpoints a clearly awful and abusive system to employees.

              • NathanUp@lemmy.mlEnglish
                2·
                1 year ago

                Agreed. They shouldn’t have to, but surely we can agree that if you’re going out to have a nice time, made possible by someone who you know to be greviously exploited, that it would be cruel and unfair to deny them their only real source of income? Under those conditions, surely going to a restaurant at all is immoral unless you exchange the worker’s labor appropriately, whether or not this obligation should befall you in an ideal world? Surely we can agree that in that moment, you are the one who decides if that worker will receive the income they need for food, clothing, healthcare, and housing, and if you will not provide it in return for your evening of leisure, it would have been better if you had stayed home and allowed that table to be occupied by someone who would choose to fairly compensate that worker?