I found a satanic trans-furry republican in my kids candy. It looked me in the eyes and said “eat a queer fetus for Jesus”

Thanks J’Biden

If you look closel, instead of calling it nut juice they just invented a new word: Almondmilk. Check your fridge (if you chug nut juice). The lawyer that came up with this deserves a dinosaur sticker on their hand.

Kinda like if I drink half of a 5 hour energy drink. Do I get 100% of the energy for 2.5 hours or 50% energy for 5 hours?

I think the ai bros decided to hit the gas on ai because it is 95% certain we will fail to stop runaway climate change and thus kill the entire planet whereas letting their superintelligence-in-development take control of everything at this crucial moment gives us a 87% chance of survival but also ensures they are able to finish their massive underground cities and automate as much as possible so they don’t need any poor, which is what the data centers are really for.

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk.

So when beds were held up with rope to support a sack of hay, a newly married couple would come to their honeymoon location and find their bed has be untied by family during the wedding. They would literally have to tie the knot to get into bed.

Hit the hay, and hit the sack used to involve whacking your hay with a detachable bedpost spire to knock the bugs living in it down to a bowl of oil under your bed.

Bonus: honeymoon got its name from the tradition of the bride eating honey for the first month of marriage to increase chances of conception.

If you can say Benedict Cumberbach or Timothy Chalemet you can say his name. English has the sounds already there, you just don’t want to do it.

Having never owned a tablet, it’s either a phone or my pc monitor. I even have an iPhone 12 MINI, and I’m a bigger dude so it looks like a business card in my hand.

I think their sick fantasy is replacement theory, but instead of whatever the far right thinks that is, they will attempt to replace the human workers that generate income and taxes 1:1 with robots. So they will have an obedient army of slave, just like they always wanted.

leans on a cane made of candy tell me more about how presidents shouldn’t just make shit up because their brains are pudding

I’m not reading this because there is nothing useful.

Resembles my life in some ways

I tell two lies for every truth I say to it. My profile is probably wildly wrong.

I feel like we will find malice was the motivator.

Big head, small face

Use tiger balm like a real man

Loss?

This is the quality oc I show up for.

More evidence of the brain damage caused in the elderly from Covid and social media

It’s ok GiantChickDicks. We will let it slide this time

My eyesight is crappy and my eye doctor is a turd, so I can’t see shit. What am I looking at here?